学生姓名：王陈瑞

所在学校：成都市实验外国语学校

案例说明：该学生自高一入学起开始学习《典范英语》，以下是他在读完《典范英语》（9）Tomb Raiders后发挥想象创作的一篇情景描写。从文中可以看出，该学生具有深厚的文学功底，用词非常生动地道，将古墓里神秘、恐怖的气氛描绘得栩栩如生。

Imaginary Sequel of Tomb Raiders

Previously on Tomb Raiders:

Many ancient Egyptian tombs were broken open and stripped clean, either just a few years after they were sealed or in more recent times. At the beginning of the 20th century, archaeologists found relatively little was left in the tombs.

However, things changed when Howard Carter and his men dug in the valley to find the tomb of the boy pharaoh. At the beginning, they unearthed sixteen steps which lead to the underground. Markings were seen at the foot of the staircase. There Carter found the symbol “Tutankhamun”, the name of the boy pharaoh. They were in the boy pharaoh’s tomb! The first room they entered had already been robbed. Then they crawled their way through small holes and reached the burial chamber. In this room, the walls were decorated with paintings of bright and fresh colours. There were pictures of the boy pharaoh and a fully mummified king encased in a wooden shrine. To their surprise, as they moved on, they discovered that the shrine was unbroken. They anticipated that the mummy was inside there. With trembling hands, Carter pulled back the bolt that held the doors shut.

Then what happened?

Cherry writes as follows：

The shrine slowly moved with a long creak while dust was stirred up all around. The faint beam of the torch promptly vanished. Lady Evelyn let out a harsh scream. ‘Steady on,’ hissed Carter, ‘the torch just ran out of electricity.’ He struck a match, squatting down. Something in the shrine was reflected in the flickering light. It was another coffin, a smaller one. It was obvious that the inner coffin was sealed up and hadn't ever been disturbed. Carter got closer. He was finally determined to open it. Then their nerves were stretched to breaking point.

After what seemed to be a lifetime, in a maze of light and dark, lay the dead king, Tutankhamun. They couldn’t infer whether the young pharaoh was handsome or not from the withered mummy. Startlingly, the body was so well preserved that it seemed as if Tutankhamun was in a deep sleep. The sense of dread crept along Lady Evelyn’s spine.

‘There’s nothing of importance. Let’s go out of here,’ she said in a hushed voice. But it only echoed away in the dead silence.

‘Mr Carter?’ Gloom spread out and Lady Evelyn’s heart began trembling like the candle light in the wind. Carter wasn’t here. What was left was only the dead mummy, lying in the coffin.

‘Carter?’ She swallowed hard, her voice louder, ‘Dad?’ Lady Evelyn couldn’t help feeling scared, her tears streaming out. In a vain attempt to get out, Lady Evelyn retraced in darkness without touching a thing. The room was even larger than it was in her mind! She could not reach the edge of the room. Every time she glanced back, she saw the mummy the same distance away.

‘It’s superstitious nonsense. It’s impossible...’ She was trying to convince herself. In the end, she stopped, gasping wildly, tense all over. Then she lost all her strength, unable even to scream, as she saw the mummy sitting up slowly…

‘Evelyn? Evelyn?’

Lady Evelyn woke up with sweat trickling down her forehead. She realised it was only a dream, a nightmare. Then she saw her dad smile, ‘Come on, girl. It’s time to go to the tomb.’

英国专家Wendy Pillipich博士点评：

This is well-written and contains appropriate vocabulary. The writer clearly identifies with the subject-matter. There is good use of advanced and technical grammar, which is impressive for a Chinese year 1 high school student.